“stop thinking about it” said the brain.
“if i did i’d die” said the heart.
so the body lived everyday
on the edge of life and death.
your past has you locked up
in chains
and a straightjacket
but think about what you’ve done.
you deserve it.
i only date brunettes,
but this girl was sitting on the floor
back against the wall,
drunk with tears
& a phone of ill news
on the carpet next to her.
she was in distress
& barely dressed,
hair a golden lion’s mane,
& the center of the universe.
i live with no rules now.
i typed this poem in one minute,
& read it over & over for an hour.
it’s the best poem i’ve ever written.
“it’s cocaining outside!” i exclaimed in jest
regarding the plummeting 8-inch snow outside,
but my Wednesday crush was behind me unseen
and i judged any chance i had in swaying her heart
was smashed to a pulp as she marched away ignoring my hellos…
but she was wrong-
i don’t do drugs-
i am drugs.
how ironic that we are fighting a war
against a plant that would prevent all wars.
i usually accept reality
no matter how unrealistic it gets.
in fact,
reality is often the
least realistic part of my life.
my darling is a tide,
ebbing & flowing.
in between her waves come impressions on the sand,
footprints,
drawings,
occasional castles-
tributes from other, weaker forces-
& she washes them away
& takes me back out to sea.
when you hold another’s hand,
whether it is black, white,
or all the colors in between,
it is another human being’s hand.
money buys happiness
there i said it.
anyone who says otherwise
has never been poor.
money complicates things
and you have to have a level head,
but no one is happy eating out of the garbage
and sleeping cold every night.
she has one eye celeste
& one eye emerald-
two personalities in her soul.
her celeste side is ice,
stopping my heart
& stealing my breath,
& her emerald side is fire,
forcing tachycardia
& setting my heart ablaze.
i am impulsive and wild,
but every vein in my body
cooperates so that my heart beats for her.
your past has you locked up
in chains
and a straightjacket
but think about what you’ve done.
you deserve it.
i just sit and observe everyone gossip about
people i don’t know
places i’ve never been
nights i didn’t go out
and realize how petty this clique is
and how their self-congratulations keep them oblivious
to how much other people loathe them,
but most intriguing
is how much they detest each other
and how the group is only held together
by a mutual sense of self-importance.
every time they put someone down
they add another brick
to the wall between themselves
and everybody else.
rewind is the way to love
because your relationships begin with a short hatred
and then long happiness
until you can’t express how much you love them,
and the reverse breakups are painless
because you find you don’t remember them at all.